by Gray Graham
Twas the night before Christmas, and all over the internet, a lot of people were stirring especially the single women. Never been married, single mothers, and divorcees. Most of the year they proclaim how happy they are, but around December 25th something they deem important seems to be missing.
Bad satire aside, I do not mean to make light of something that for a lot of women is a very important. For a lot of single women it is the most important thing. Christmas is the ultimate reminder that you are by yourself and alone.
There is no substitute for being married with children. You either are or you are not. No amount of family and friends is going to change that. Christmas for a lot of women means time with your husband and your children. Without that many women feel very lost.
Now if you are a woman that feels alone throughout the year, the anxiety of being single goes up a thousandfold during the holiday season. Every time you see a couple together, someone tells you their Christmas plans with their family, or someone asks you your plans for the holidays, a great sadness come over you.
It doesn’t help that you see Christmas movie after movie of how a woman finds true love during the holidays. The perfect man of her dreams swoops in to save her from the bottomless pit of loneliness that is her life.
Even when you log onto social media, you see post after post of someone complaining about being lonely. They hope that someone, anyone, wants to snuggle with them just to escape the cold of winter. Just a moment to forget how lonely they are.
The worst part is that people keep telling you that some man is going to find you and make you his wife. as long as you keep the faith. It is the same story year, after year, after year.
I don’t wish to be the bearer of bad news, but there isn’t going to be a husband waiting for you under the Christmas tree when you wake up Christmas morning. There will not be a Christmas miracle husbands popping up across the country. Marriage doesn’t work that way. If you are lonely when you are single, you are still going to be lonely if you are married.
If we are honest many of the women that want a husband during Christmas are the same women that do not have the time or do not have a need to be married they rest of the year. At Christmas they are too caught up on the idea of magically being married instead of what it takes to be a wife. It is easy to marry but it is hard for most people to be married. It is even harder for most to be married and happy. The majority of people failed at marriage every day.
Instead of being caught up on the idea of getting a husband for Christmas, you should be thinking about enjoying the life you have today. If you are a mother then your primary focus should be raising your children. If you are without children then you should spend time getting to know yourself.
The truth is that everyone is not going to get married. As you get older, the chances of you getting married goes down. The more times you get married the chances of you staying married goes down. Marriage is not something that just happens especially as you get older.
Are there people that get married and find true love later in life? Sure there are and I know a few ladies that got married later in life and then had children. This however is the exception and not what happens normally.
The hard truth is that some people are just never going to get married and for a lot of different reasons. It doesn’t make their lives less meaningful. You are not less of a woman if you have never been married or never had any children. You are still a woman and still as beautiful and any other woman God created. Not having a husband does not take away from this truth.